Can’t wait for summer!!!!!

I love summer! your off from school you can get a job and go to the pool pretty much whenever you want! Summer though is long yet so short it goes by like THAT! I want to make the most of my summer this year. I want to gets JOBSSS (plural) so that I can save up for a car because I get my temporary license this summer and coming this winter I’ll have my actual drivers license!!! I am soooo excited! I really need to study for the test though because I want to feel like I accomplished something without having to retrty it. I also want to possibly find something i’m really interested in like a sport or activity I can be involved in the following school year. I never really had something that was just for me and made my world go round. I enjoy things such as swimming but I’m not compettitive enough to make that a full time sport of mine ๐Ÿ˜ Then there’s art which is fun and a great hobby of mine but I am not really talented enough to be considered an artist and because of that I can’t carry that on. Sooooo…….what shall I do? Do I like theater? Could I play soccer? Maybe i’m interested in science? Who knows????? Haha I sure don’t! I know that I love animals but there really isn’t anything offered at my school involving animals that I am interested in :\ Well I have this whole summer to keep this in mind………

I really feel like having all the fun I can. But does that mean crazy parties? Or going beyond my usual limits? I just want to make the most of my life now. YOLO right?

Why does everything work opposite for me? I like someone they like someone else. I like someone my friend starts to like that person. I just wish for once things would go my way. I wish a certain person in my life would wake up one day and see clearly. I want to tell you so bad but I just can’t seem too.

Birthday

Today is my birthday what a wonderful day to celebrate ME. No care in the world just a smile on my face. I hear happy birthday through the hallyway, at the table before school, even in homeroom. What a wonderful feeling. I get cards and presents, and cake . But thats not most important. I just brush off confidence and happiness all throughout the day. Thank you to all those who took a second or so of their day to wish me a happy birthday. It just made my day better one by one. I hope your day went as well as mine. I will remember your kindness in the form of words, hugs, and even posters on my locker! Thanks. โค ๐Ÿ™‚

Self Esteem

Hey there self esteem how are you today? Ugh feeling kind of bad about myself and my body ๐Ÿ˜ฆ Why is that? It’s a long story………Everyone has problems with their self esteem for me it is that I am very pale, and I cannot sing. There are other things that affect my self esteem as well but right now my mind is drawing a blank. I understand that I am amazing I am one of Gods creations. But that doesn’t always do it for me ๐Ÿ˜ฆ I have trouble going outsside the box I try but right when I’m up against the edge I take one little step and run back. I think I should stop thinking of the things I don’t like about myself and think about positive things. But sometimes that’s not humanly possible. So what do you do when you have low self esteem and you have an endless list of things that you don’t like about yourself. Well you think about your friends and think what they don’t like about themselves and say hey they get through life and enjoy life to the fullest no matter what. Even when things get in their way they worry for a little then ignore it and go on with their life like everything is perfect. Although I wish this was like a math problem and there was a formula I had for low self esteem there’s just no such thing. I know im not perfect and I never will be but when someone says somehting to me that makes me look and myself or body in a bad way I ignore it and throw it away! No one is perfect so why judge yourself when everyone else feels the same if we all let our insecurities get to us, well we’d be in a lot of trouble! Don’t just bottle up your insecurities..that could lead to a very bad explosion! Think aboout them for a little bit get through it and decide what your going to do next don’t let them drag you around, take control !

Let’s just make this clear..Life isn’t fair! Life can be rewarding at times but life never is always fair. There is always someone involved or behind the story with these ideas that are expressed.ย  It’s hard when it’s a relationship. There are many friends that I have thought of in a different way. What makes it especially hard is when you’ve been friends with someone for what seems live forever and you begin to like them more than just a friend. I have had andย in this type of experience currently. The problem I always face is do I save our friendship or do I take a chance? What if things don’t work out? What if he doesn’t like me in that way? What if we don’t make a good couple? It could ruin our friendship forver. We are different ages and in different schools how would that work? All these things go through my head like rain in a storm. But the problem that makes everything harder is when he talkes about other girls to me ๐Ÿ˜ฆ Although I’m there to support him it’s always hard to listen to him talking about girls he dates, likes or whatever else. Just my luck everytime i’m ready to tell him something interfere’s maybe there’s a new girl in the picture or he’s having a hard time. I just never seem to come at a right time and everytime I try I get knocked further and further back. So it comes down to do I save our friendship or do I take a chance and risk our friendship?

Live life to the fullest! Do everything you want to do. Go skydiving or bungee jumping or my favorite on my bucket list is to scuba dive! What have you got to lose you were put in this world for a reason why not celebrate it? Do what you want when you want and if you don’t like it do something else. Nothing is ever truly permanent other than a few things….Maybe your like my friend and want to dye your hair and pierce you ears. Well you can try it maybe you don’t like the color so change it! You shouldn’t have to wonder what something is like you should be the one who has experienced it and inspires everyone else to do it. (I DONT MEAN DRINK OR DO DRUGS!!!) I hope you reflect on something in your life that has always been a dream of yours and do it! If something steps in your way like money do what you can thats close to it. It doesn’t have to be something expensive! LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST!

Why does there have to be homework? I understand that the teachers want us to do something productive at home istead of lazy. But I learn better in class rather than at home. There are countless distractions ie: the tv, my phone, my laptop, my cat, my friends, my parents, and whatever else I’m doing that day. TEACHERS WE DO HAVE A LIFE OTHER THAN SCHOOL!!! If you gave us less homework maybe we would be more enthusiastic about school. Or maybe even think that yes like you do we have a life and homework distracts us from our lives and then when something comes up and we didn’t get our homework done we are punished for something we most likely had no control over or it wasn’t a good enough excuse for you. How would you feel if we told you that your grading was bad and that you could do better and that why don’t we have our tests back right away….but no we never do that so maybe one day just take a step back and think about what your giving us! I understand you want to push us to strive in school but isn’t there other ways than lots of homework? You know in summer I do want school, I actually like school. Other than the homework. Why cant every night we read a section or do simple worksheets or questions instead of a huge project that we don’t understand and don’t have enough time on our schedule to do? You know what after typing all this I realize it’s not that bad but still homework is sometimes an annoyance and it can drive you a little crazy!!!

Some many changes occur daily and for some reason we accept these changes. Somehow we just adapt and never question why these changes were made or why we never really noticed.